Somedays

I wish I could just disappear.

All the people who have a place in my heart have grown to hate me, more than anyone. I dunno why, but it makes me feel like shit.

This is why Im always so negative and angry, cuz its a waste. People I care for, love, hold dear, and try and help out before myself, they end up hating me and being a waste of time.

I wish theyd see how good a friend I am. I was always there to talk to when things were wrong, there to try and help make things better, I tried to help everyone I could, didnt care too much about what happened to me as a result, ended up just somehow fucking things up and making people hate me, despite my good natured heart and kindness.

If you see me and I act like a dick, now you know why. I tried to be a nice guy, I tried to be different, but I cant let my guard down for anyone anymore, cuz I end up getting fucked over again and again and again.

I hate saying this, but I love you so much I hate you, and vice versa.